Why You Should Set Boundaries for Friends with Benefits
Maintaining a friends with benefits arrangement is harder work than most assume. Keeping your physical and emotional attractions separate can be very difficult to people, especially once things get more intimate, which is why it is important to set some boundaries for anyone looking to enter a friends with benefits situation.
If you don't, things can be complicated very quickly. Without any sort of groundwork in place for the arrangement, people can go into a friends with benefits situation with different expectations of what's going to happen, which is never a good thing.
Let's take a closer look at why you should set boundaries for friend with benefits:
Establishing Your Relationship
When you set boundaries for friends with benefits, you immediately establish what your relationship is going to be. Many people are unfamiliar with what real friends with benefits are, which is one of the big reasons it's so hard to maintain this type of relationship!
You want to know exactly what the FWB situation is, which is where setting boundaries can help. In doing this, you lay the rules down for the relationship so that you know exactly where you stand, which for most is clarifying that nobody wants to get emotionally attached, instead maintaining a strong friendship while still having a sexual relationship.
It may differ in each situation, which is why it helps to set boundaries, so you know precisely what the friends with benefits relationship is from the get-go.
For instance, many people confused with a f**k buddy. While there are similarities, friends with benefits involves adding sex into the mix while maintaining an existing friendship, while fuck buddies are acquaintances that hook up a lot but aren't anything more.
So You Both Know What You Want
Another important thing with friends with benefits is both agreeing what you both want from the arrangement. By setting ground rules early, you both clearly know what you want, and if things aren't to your liking you can call it quits before things get too complicated.
Also, its useful to set ground rules for the smaller things you may overlook. For example, if you have sex are you going to stay the night? Is there a minimum notice for arranging a hook-up? Are you going to socialise outside of the bedroom?
These are all things you need to establish and by setting boundaries you both get what you want from the situation.
The last thing FWB needs it for each person to want different things but not speaking up about it! By setting boundaries, everyone can say what they want and don't want, ensuring everyone is on the same page.
Avoiding Awkward Situations
Setting boundaries as FWB is a good way to avoid those awkward situations. For example, what if you show up unannounced to surprise them and find out they are at home with another date? What if you want to stay over after sex but they really hate the idea of a sleepover?
These are just a few of the awkward situations that can arise if both people haven't set any boundaries.
This is something everyone involved obviously wants to avoid as nobody wants to feel embarrassed by their FWB, so be sure to set boundaries to avoid any unnecessary embarrassment down the road.
Doing so will ensure a fun time between two friends without any of the emotional baggage. It's a hard balance to strike but with boundaries in place you'll increase the chances of a successful friends with benefits relationship.